ONLINE DATING TIPS
50 and Fabulous: Navigating Online Dating as a 50-Year-Old
Back in the days, if someone were to say you can go out with someone from another country without traveling, people would call it witchcraft. But now, it’s a completely normal thing to do and it’s through online dating.
In your heyday, you could personally find a lover in school, at work or through your friends. Then you’d woo them by writing love letters, or hanging around your landline phone as you muster the courage to call them.
Today, however, when you talk about dating, people talk about DMs, or Tinder matches — basically online dating. Something which, to an older demographic, might sound foreign.
Admittedly, gentlemen in their 50’s, or perhaps older, are more attuned to the classic school of dating. And no, it’s never too late to date. Consider it a second prime, where having achieved status, a career, and a reliable amount of life experience, they are in fact extremely desirable on the world stage of dating.
Dating has now become digital.
Because of its intricacies, older men and women are reluctant to give it a serious look. But don’t worry. I’m here to tell you it’s not as difficult as you’d think, and by following these steps, you’ll slowly master your way around online dating:
Pick a site.
Picking a site might sound like an easy task, with a plethora of dating sites available.
But it isn’t. Finding the right dating site isn’t going to be easy with all the possible risks of scammers and liars.
So, first, you need to make sure it’s a legit site that offers you authentic profiles of its users. You can do this by looking at reviews and testimonials, or asking the internet for their suggestions.
For example, if you are looking to meet loving and beautiful women, there are a lot of less mainstream sites, which can cater to your needs.
While dating apps like Tinder are less filtered and cater to instant peer-to-peer dating, you may want to use specialized matchmaking sites that have in-country, on-the-ground offices, making their services legitimate and safe.
A good example of this is Asian Love Mates, which specializes in matching men who are interested in dating women from countries like China, Thailand, and the Philippines.
Sites like these are filled with women who are also looking for love, and are especially not particular with age. They also authenticate whoever registers on their sites, and run background checks to ensure everyone who’s using their service remains safe.
Register
Most sites are going to require you to make an account or a profile on their site. Details such as birthdate, postal code, your email address and password are what’s commonly asked for when signing up.
Lastly, never forget your password!
If you’re using your phone, it might prompt you to save your log-in details, so you won’t need to remember them or write them somewhere else. You won’t want to lose a potential lover just because you forgot your password.
Create a decent profile
Commonly, profiles are there to catch the interest of other users.
Here, you need to properly introduce yourself but don’t make it so long it might as well be an autobiography. Else, your profile could easily be boring and will be something that’s easily skipped.
Pack as much information but be concise. You can mention your interests: “Lover of dogs.” “Plays golf.”
If you’re on a matchmaking site like Asian Love Mates, an informative profile is crucial for you to find a compatible match.
So, unlike other dating apps, you will need to be as detailed as possible in your profile. Go all in and share as much information about yourself.
Mention things that you think would affect your compatibility with someone. Talk about your preferences and what you’re looking for in a woman.
You can be blunt and straightforward about it: “I am looking for someone who I can start a family with. Someone who loves kids, as much as I do. Someone who can dedicate time for the family.”
Why does this matter?
While most dating sites match you according to your location and a few of your interests, some may match you randomly with other users.
Matchmaking sites take a different approach. They use real and professional matchmakers to help find you a match according to your preferences and profile. Sometimes, you can’t replace the human element.
Once you are matched, then you can engage with your matches and gauge your compatibility.
Make use of your communication options
Don’t limit yourself to using only conventional communication channels. If your dating site offers multiple ways for you to reach out to your match, then use them.
Never be afraid to use something different and new for you.
Some sites may offer an option for you to video call, so use it to your advantage. Show your match something unique about you, or let them in your daily routines. This is another way for them to get to know you.
In Asian Love Mates, they offer several options for communication.
You can try writing letters — show her the old school can still be really romantic. There’s also a possibility for you to send her personally picked gifts, and once the right opportunity comes you can invite her to meet up and spend time together personally.
Make your needs known
It’s important that you and your match have the same goals and desires going into the relationship.
If you’re 50 or so and already looking for someone whom you can build a family with, it’s your duty to be honest about it. Don’t compromise by being with someone who doesn’t have the same long term goals as you.
But of course, you don’t need to put it out the moment you start communicating.
You need to ease it in. You can’t immediately say you’re only there to find someone who can be the mother of your future children. Doing so might make you seem desperate, and can drive away potential lovers.
Get to know each other first. Perhaps, if they’re open about it, you can start by learning about her family, her likes, dislikes. And once you get a little closer, then you can slowly open up about your motives and intentions. See if they reciprocate it.
Lastly, embrace your age
Being older than the other interested parties isn’t something you should be ashamed of. If there’s one thing you should refrain from doing is faking yourself and trying really hard to fit in with her generation.
Be you. There’s no need to be insecure about your age because the right one will take interest in who you truly are.
You might feel it might be too late for you to meet someone you can be with for the rest of your life. But as they say — as long as you can still try, it’s never too late.
Relax, and take your time finding someone and make sure you’ve created a strong, genuine connection.
